Things a 2nd Grader Says

I have been so lucky to teach an amazing group of 2nd graders this year. One of the perks of being a teacher (to me) is hearing what 7-8 year olds say on a daily basis. If you haven't had a conversation with a child lately, I highly recommend it! After hearing some of the funniest things they said at the beginning of the year, I decided to start writing them down! Below are some of the hilarious comments I got to hear this year.

T: "Did you guys watch the NBA game last night?"

S: "Yes!"

T: "Oh yea, who played?"

S: "Natcher!"

S: "UK!"

S: "Jody Richards!"

S: "Principal Obama"

-During the 3rd Grade Wax Museum

-Students walked around and pressed a fake button to get the 3rd graders to talk. 

S: "We are only touching the buttons of the cute boys."

T: "Well whose have you touched?"

S: "No ones!"

S: "My dads farts kills the dinosaurs."

-On a day that it was raining really bad.

S: "Are we still going to have reading"

S: "Is Mr. Thornhill going to let us go home?"

S: "Is school going to be cancelled?"

S: "Have you heard of a place called Minute Mart?"

-While listening to a student read a book about earthquakes.

S: "Scientists measure earthquakes using the rectal scale." 

T: "What's a word that rhymes with race?"

S: "Base!"

T: "Okay, give me a sentence with the word base."

S: "I'm all about that bass, 'bout that bass, no treble!"

-On Martin Luther King Jr. Day students wrote down their own dreams.

S: "My dream is to get rid of all the cigarettes and to only have eCigs."

-I told a student she would be a car rider that afternoon.

S: "Yea, my mom is having surgery."

T: "Oh no, what's wrong?"

S: "Her energy."

T: "Her energy?"

S: "Yea, they said she has too much energy so she's getting it taken out."

S: "She tried to tell me she was a Bosnian, but I know she wasn't!"

-On the first day I wear my glasses to school.

S: "Is it nerd day?"

-I tell the class I'm going to a writing training and they will have a substitute.

S: "Why are going? You already know how to write."

-Talking about animal habitats in the desert.

T: "What animals do you know that live in the desert?"

S: "Cantaloupe!"

-My coffee pot makes a beeping noise.

S: "The clothes are ready!"

-Students wrote a letter to me in their journals.

S: "Also, I would like to know if you are EVER going to get married?"

-While eating lunch with the kids. 

S: "This fried fish is delicious!" (While eating his tater tot). 

T: "What do you want to be when you grow up?"

S: "Elsa."

T: "If you could ask the president something, what would you ask him?" 

S: "Do you just sit around and watch TV all day?"

-Student crying hysterically at recess

T: "What happened?"

S: "There's something in my hand!"

T: "What did you touch?"

S: "The tree! It bit me! Awghhh!!"

T: "I think it's just wood, probably a splinter. Would you like a band-aid?"

S: "OH  YEA?!?! Does the wood have wings?"

S: "I'm too young to die!"

-Student is telling me how rich he is. 

T: "Oh really? How much money do you have?"

S: "2."

-I asked the class to make a prediction about our weekly story based on the following vocabulary words: awaken, cliffs, mountain, prize, rainbow, suffer, volcano. 

T: "What do these words make you think of?"

S: "The Wild West because there's a lot of prizes at the casinos there!"

S1: "Do animals have souls"

S2: "Yes, all living things have souls."

S1: "Noooo, plants are living things and they don't have souls."

S2: "Yea huh!! Well...only the organic ones." 

-Students are arguing about boys vs. girls.

S: "Do you know Martin Luther King changed?! He said boys can be with girls!" 

-Talking about labels in a nonfiction book.

T: "If I were to put a label on this (pointing to my nose), what would it say?"

S: "Ear!" 

S: "My daddy shaved my toes this morning." 

S1 (girl): "What's a tomboy?"

S2 (boy): "Girls that like to play outside and do boy stuff."

S1 (girl): "Do boys like girls that are tomboys?"

S2 (boy): "Yea, well I mean I do."

-Our block student on her last day with us.

S: (shaking his head) "Hmmm...they grow up too fast."

T: "What items do we know that are scarce?" 

S: "A Lambo."

-I asked everyone to write something that they wish I knew about them. There was a popular story in the news about a teacher that did this and received amazing feedback. This is what I got...
S: "I wish my teacher knew I had a cat."
S: "I wish my teacher knew my favorite color."
S: "I wish my teacher knew I had a brother."
S: "I wish my teacher knew where I lived."